There is a deeply embedded sense of inferiority and self-hatred in the human psyche. The gnawing question in everyone’s mind is: how can I prove myself to be better than others, the best one among my peers?
This is classic male animal behavior. To prove oneself the most suitable male, there is a fight. Whoever wins is proven to be superior, and secures mating rights with the female. In animals, superiority is proven with strength, whereas in humans, there are many different ways – with strength, wealth, power, beauty, intellect, talent, respect, fame, and so on. But the underlying force for proving superiority is the same – to ensure selection as a mate and thereby ensure propagation of one’s genes. In other words, inferiority is a feature of evolution.
For humans, inferiority has extended beyond biology into our psychology, our societies, and our cultures – we found many ways of expressing superiority. Consequently, the problem impacts all humans, not just males of the species. For us, inferiority has intensified and compounded to catastrophic proportions. This single pattern is perhaps responsible for all the diverse manifestations of human suffering. The good news is that we have the intelligence to see this programming in ourselves and to transcend it, but it requires individual, meditative work on oneself.
As a meditation method, look within yourself and see: inferiority incites comparison, competition, jealousy, which in turn fuel hatred, anger, frustration, violence, and misery. Try to realize that by default, you believe yourself inferior and unworthy, except for times when you are able to somehow prove otherwise. Even when at times you do manage, through Herculean efforts, to obtain some proof, it is inevitably finite and fleeting, whereas your consciousness is continuous and existent beyond the mere moments of proof. So you constantly need to be in search of ways to prove yourself not inferior, not worthless. You are caught in a vicious cycle of self-hatred. Try to realize that this behavior is rooted in biological conditioning, as discussed above.
As you are, you are valuable. Nothing needs to be added or removed; no improvement is needed. No accomplishment needs to be added on top of you to make you worthy. As you are, you are perfect. You don’t need to prove yourself to be superior. You are neither inferior nor superior; you are just yourself – unique, incomparable, the first of your kind. No proof is needed before you can accept and love yourself. Worthiness is self-evident, intrinsic in being; to be is to be worthy. Accept yourself unconditionally, as you are – for no reason, but for the sake of acceptance itself. Why should you need anyone else’s permission or approval to do so?
In this way, sitting silently for meditation, try to realize your intrinsic self, that which is already there, which is lucid, joyous, and loving. Don’t compare yourself to others, because everyone is unique. Comparison is a fallacy, and we are accustomed to comparing any and every little thing. Being is greater than comparison. Notice all the big and small comparisons your mind is making out of habit and then invalidate and discard them.
A meditator who practices this method becomes extraordinarily fulfilled, joyous, and free within himself or herself, independent of any success or failure, victory or defeat. Their self-worth and self-love do not depend on external circumstances, conditions, or on other people’s approval of them, because the source of their light is inner, freestanding, primordial. These people radiate love and compassion to everyone around them, unconditionally.
Only one who loves himself or herself can truly love others. Thus, true love and compassion are byproducts of meditation, an overflowing of one’s own cup – and not directed at any one person, but available to anyone and everyone around you who is open to receive them. You want to share love, give it away freely, and you are grateful towards others who receive it. By sharing, meditative love grows and consciousness blossoms.